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May 17th

I’m not going to lie, I’ve relapsed into my eating disorder. It’s weird honestly. I’m happiest when I haven’t eaten. I have a lot, I should be okay. I have a wonderfulwonderfulbeautifullovely girlfriend, but I’m relapsing hard. Luckily this time there is no binging, or no purging.

May 17th Hi 109
March 10th
March 6th
March 6th
Le intake

Coffee w/sugar -40
banana- 90
grapes, yogurt, apple, 1/2 teaspoon of peanut butter- 180
spinach salad, squash. -110
peanut butter sandwich- 170 + 80
rice chips (100)
tea, pickles, peanut butter, a cookie- 40, 10, 80, 60

March 6th
March 5th This is me now, 15 pounds heavier, with so much more confidence.
March 5th A little more than a year and a half ago, I looked like this. I went from 117 pounds to 96. I thought I was fat. I barely ate and I abused laxatives. I cut because I hated myself. My eating disorder made me hate myself. I got to the point where I was going to commit suicide because I felt worthless. So one day, I tried getting help. But, I never ended up getting the help I needed. So, I went from 98 pounds to 110 with bulimia. Then, after bulimia came a time where all I ever did was binge. I got all the way up to 126 pounds on my 4’11 body. Once again, I wanted to kill myself. I’ve been teaching myself how to eat properly for awhile now. It’s hard. I’ve developed severe GERD and there aren’t many things I can eat without feeling sick. I might also have a few other medical conditions, I’m still getting tested for them. I’m around 116 pounds now. I’m a lot happier, but I still screw up. I sometimes cut, everyone messes up. I’m on my way to losing 10-15 pounds, but I’m doing it healthily. I’ve gained a lot of confidence too. I’m proud.
March 5th I used to be really small. But then again, I wasn’t eating and I was abusing laxatives. But still.
March 5th

so, the plan to losing this 10- 15 pounds.

little meat, no dairy

1000 calories at the most a day

weigh in once a month

cool.

March 5th
January 29th
January 29th My new running shorts make my non existent butt look good.
January 29th